In Planet Narnia, Ward posits that Lewis has Aslan wear the masks of his beloved seven medieval heavens, the seven planets, one for each book.

I see the masks of the planets, in both their positive and negative aspects, on the Hogwarts tricksters: the Defense Against the Dark Arts teachers. Who better to represent

• SATURN than the leaden Quirinus Quirrell, with his soft demeanor, dull, troll-like intellect and head wrapped in fabric rings?

• JUPITER than the tinny Gilderoy Lockhart, whose jovial celebrity mocks today’s media royalty?

• THE MOON than the ever increasingly silver-haired Remus Lupin, the noble and terrifying werewolf?

• MURCURY than the slippery, shape-shifting Bartemius Crouch Jr, who was personally commissioned by Voldemort to “send a message”?

• THE SUN than the merciless bright and cheery Dolores Umbridge, whose pursuit of purity, power and perfection remove her so far from humanity she doesn’t need a Dark Mark?

• VENUS than our prince of vitriolic verdigris, Severus Snape, whose life was shaped and driven by undying love?

• MARS by the brazen Tom Riddle, DADA wanna-be who takes on the mantle not only of the God of War, but of Mars Silvaneous when he makes the forest his HQ?

Are you slapping your forehead, Gentle Reader? Saying “Uh, Duh!” or more likely (cue Mr. Rickman) “Obviously!” In my moment of discovery, I was tickled to remember Michael Ward’s uncharacteristic lapse from academic tone as he described his Aha moment:

“I did not shout ‘Eureka!’ and run naked down the street like Archimedes, but I did jump from my bed in a state of undress and began to pull books from my shelves, chasing links from work to work.”

Not being an academic, I did not jump from my bed after my discovery–just tee-hee’ed myself back to sleep.

Today I did pull books from my shelf and saw that Ward dates his discovery in 2003, well after Sorcerer’s Stone. Creating a complete seven-member set of astrologically symbolic characters is a trick Jo must have learned elsewhere. Perhaps, Gentle Reader, you might suggest where?

I read the HP series. I could tell what was going to happen too far ahead. No mystery for me. The language was childish. I read JG’s Deathly Hallows Lecture book and listened to a couple podcasts of his lectures. I’ll just say that I’m not on the same page as him wrt some HP specifics, and have a hard time aligning with those presuppositions, but agree with him generally.

As to copper as penetrating and male, it is only in relation to iron. With its pink and sea-green hues, its malleability, thermal conductivity, etc. it is almost always thought of as female.

Theo. Paracelsus, Blessed Raymond Lull, the Jewish and Arab charcoal burners (see R. Patai, I think) all understood this in a subtle sense. Copper will dissolve interstitially through Fe readily.

In a gross sense, if you want to pierce a hole in a 10 foot thick billet of steel, shoot a stream of molten copper at it. It’s done in industry all the time.

Again, these things are not intuitive.

Just for fun, do some historical research on a couple metals, say Uranium and Plutonium. We know what happens when you combine them just so. Now look at the times and dates when this has been done, correlate these astrological charts, and see what the relative yields have been. I’ll bet that most of you don’t know that this is always done prior to such tests.

God does not like such sorcery.

You say that, presumably, the Harry Potter series is ‘leaden’ children’s literature. Please list some of you beefs to support that view.

Calling me names reveals you don’t understand the spirit or intention of this forum. Please read through the posts and comments and identify all the uncharitable, ad hominem comments in our discussions.

Couldn’t find any — other your own? Neither could I.

You are welcome at Hogwarts Professor only as long as you conform to the standards of civility we have here. Snarky comments cloaked in sophomoric sophistry just won’t cut it.

For instance, Venus’s state is thought to correspond to the female. Its corresponding metal is Cu, the penetrating male metal. Conversely, Mars’s state is thought to correspond to the male, though it’s metal is Fe, the quintessential receptive and grounding iron of the Earth – a female type.

And so it goes.

Forgive me, but methinks the real alchemist here is Granger; trying to transmute leaden children’s books into literary gold. And a good alchemist he is, a mountebank nonetheless.

Time to move on to another burg. Twilighttown, here we come!

I can point out that in Tolkien, gold + sun are feminine and silver + moon are masculine. I have the tenuous beginning of an insight why, beyond die Sonne and der Mond.